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What Temperature Does My Monitor Burn At?

by Brandon

Some people like their gaming news delivered to them in a form that requires the use of a magnifying glass or an inordinate amount of scrolling with ones mouse. To that end, AFK Magazine has been launched. That’s right, a gaming/tv/movie/books? magazine. As if to prove that the horse is, in fact dead, AFK Magazine, in their brilliantly designed “Magazine Browser” has put up their first issue to be read. It combines the best of background music that almost, but not quite entirely makes you want to jam a knife into your eye with the brilliance of load times that make even high speed users wait for delivery of the next page.

Speaking of presentation why is it that they have to use a font for certain elements that makes my eyes bleed with the way it contorts letters, wouldn’t it be easier to just, I don’t know, give us the information in a clearly readable format? Am I crazy here? Does this font have some sort of proven statistical backing of getting people to read what it holds? Is it a hardcore font that only the truly “leet” can fully understand? I literally spent over 30 seconds trying to decipher why they were trying to tell me the “HHOART interview” was an AFK magazine exclusive. Were those in fact H’s? They certainly looked like it. Maybe they were chairs. Was this some sort of comment on the fact that so many gamers are accused of sitting around all day? Was this a cleverly disguised way of making a strong statement about how the world at large view games as a “kid’s hobby” and not art? Wait, no, it was the letter “M” not “H”. Just the way my dog writes that letter as it so happens, I should have known, it’s obviously the popular “Canine on carpet after playing in the mud” font, silly me.

Now, maybe you are thinking to yourself that I am being harsh, after all, it is only the first issue. That’s true, it’s issue one, of, if we are all lucky a long run in which they fix the problems with the magazine and create a utopia for pop culture. However, that remains to be seen, and I can only talk about what I know. I hope it gets better, I really do, and I’ll wait for issue two to find out, until then, my opinion stands.

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7 Responses to “What Temperature Does My Monitor Burn At?”

  1. Josh Says:

    I thought the feature that allowed me to zoom the pages in and out with my mouse wheel was kind of interesting. But alas you are right it was like reading one of the dreaded wall o’ texts that every MMO player hates.

  2. Josh Says:

    Ok yes I am a loser but I have to double post. If anyone out there is a player of WoW they should read the interview on pages 14-15. For those of us who truly know the game and how it really works it seems blizzard is as clueless as they lead us to think.

  3. Danny Says:

    though it was kewl personally - better than just another lame ass website or blog, already 2 many of them around.

    oh, and fyi, dunno what ur talkin about with that “H” instead of “M” rubbish, yeh, on sum button on their site its a bit dodgy, but thats not in the mag, which u’d know if u actually read the thing ur tryin to criticize.

    pages can load a bit slow if u have a crap comp, thats why u can change quality, with the button that says, u guess it, “quality”

    Liked the music n stuff too, but again, for whiners, theres an option 2 turn that off.

    Not perfect, but defintly entertainin and original, u shud try it sumtime :P

  4. Brandon Says:

    Ouch Danny, your words cut me like a knife. You’ll notice that I didn’t, in fact, criticize the content of the magazine, which I did read and found it to be perfectly acceptable. The pages may indeed load slowly because I have, as you so eloquently put it, “a crap comp”.

    Seeing as I’m not the only one in the world with a computer that could use an upgrade I imagine that makes me among good company.

    I tried to be fairly specific with where I mentioned the M vs. H argument, perhaps I should have stopped to let my readers know “this is on the main page of the site, not actually inside the magazine itself” would that have helped? I assumed, with your uncanny ability to read, you and the rest of my readers would have picked up where I meant, I apologize for your confusion.

    I see also you don’t like my criticism of the music, oops, guess I should go and change that. I mean, I know when I’m reading a print magazine I turn the pages and expect music to start playing like it’s some kind of a radio (P.S. that’s sarcasm there, just so you know).

    I’ll try to be more entertaining and original, in the meantime you should try graduating high school and getting a job (we can only hope one where you don’t, in fact, need to write anything).

    Thanks for stopping by!

  5. MMO Gaming » Blog Archive » If I’m the Devil, Than You’re in Hell Says:

    […] Okay, as much as I disagree with Danny’s comment he did point out that perhaps, as I mentioned, I was a bit harsh. So, I’d like to clarify a few points here. […]

  6. Paul Says:

    I hate when people can’t take the time to spell “some” by turning it into “sum”. That, or when they are too dumb to know the difference between the two words.

  7. MMO Gaming » Blog Archive » AFK Magazine Issue 2, e-Mag done Right? Says:

    […] AFK Magazine Issue 2, e-Mag done Right? February 2nd, 2007 by Brandon aMusic from AFK Magazine was kind enough to send me an e-mail to let me know that issue 2 had been released and that they had worked, and continue to work on some of the suggestions myself, and others made. […]

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